Ultimate Learning--To learn from people we dislike

29.05.2010

Prof V H Iyer renowned consultant from Mumbai was in Chennai today. He is a senior faculty of the Management Study Centre at Mumbai. We had invited him to our the Centre and he had consented to do so in spite of his busy schedule. We received him today at 11:30 AM.

Prof. V H Iyer is on the board of various companies and Government Depts like Indian Council for Agricultural Research, and is currently Dean of the Prince Welingkar Institute of Management Mumbai. Prof. Iyer is an internationally recognized authority on Materials Management and Lean Principles.

During the chat we had in my cabin, Prof. Iyer spoke about a book that he has conceived and is proposing to write. He is basically from a family of Tanjore Brahmins who moved to Palghat a long time ago. His family had moved again from Nurani, a famous village in Palghat to Burma where prof. Iyer was born and had spent his early childhood. During WW II when Burma was evacuated, Prof. Iyer had had to flee Burma and spent two years in a refugee camp. He is planning to write about his experiences from Refugee camp to where he is now.

The book would not be autobiographical. It would be a document of his experiential learning over a long period and his thoughts about people he had met and worked with.

Prof. Iyer remarked that we can learn from everyone, including people we dislike! He gave the example of an OR Professor in his B School who was so insulting that she was universally disliked. Prof. Iyer says he learnt many tips on ‘how not to teach’ from her!

Difficult Behavior

On 28^th May I attended a “Management Show” at British Council on Handling Difficult People. There were about thirty people. The facilitator divided us into six groups.

She began by asking us to list out as a group various categories of difficult people we meet in the work place. Some of the categories that emerged were Detractors, Deviators, Non-Communicators, Procrastinators and the Manipulative.

(One interesting comment was about a boss who was unfocused. The participant stated t that the boss was focused in many directions!)

We were then asked to answer the following questions:

1. How do you feel when you experience difficult behavior?

It stresses you. It affects your poise. It brings out the negative in you. Sometimes you become a difficult person yourself!

2. Whose problem is the difficult behavior?

It is essentially the other person’s problem but it is ours too if it will affect achievement of the long term goals of the organization or if we have to work with the difficult person to perform our organizational role.

3. Should difficult behavior be confronted?

Yes. But we redefined the word “to confront” and decided that difficult behavior should be addressed suitably through dialogue or counseling. But confrontation should be avoided when it would worsen the situation.

One of the issues we discussed was about the nature of the difficult behavior which could be Cultural, Personilty or Behavioral. The current session dealt only with bwehavioral. We accepted that personality should not be discussed while addressing difficult behavior. What need to be addressed are specific behavioral issues. I added that, ‘we should address what the person is doing, and not what he or she is.’

The trainer thereafter played a brief video prepared by Fenman Management Training. In this video Philip a Management Consultant handles a difficult person, the head of another team who is demanding and incapable of being satisfied.

The video also gave us a four step approach for handling difficult people, which involved assessing, analyzing, asserting and finally formalizing a Deal by assenting.

Due to insufficiency of time and the trainer’s own inability to relate to the essence of the issue, the practicing managers in the audience felt we had not truly got a handle on how to deal with difficult people.

In the Begining...

In the beginning there was an immense amount of energy; this energy was directionless, formless, devoid of content, and importantly purposeless. This huge energy force discovered a miniscule mass, an atom, of matter and entered it.

When an infinite force enters a microscopic space the result is a massive explosion. This explosion enabled the matter to expand, take forms and shapes having names, to evolve as such into what we now call the universe. The universe is made up matter pervaded by energy.

The energy is inert in some forms of matter whilst in others it is exuberant. These exuberant forms further evolved to become various life forms and sentient beings.

Gene Carriers

This is a photo of my son Srivatsan with my parents. As I took this photo, I could not help but feel that we are no more than Gene carriers passing on the gene from one generation to the next.

Children are our greatest chance to rectify the mistakes of our life and prevent them from being repeated again by another generation.

Edutainment at SAIPEM

On 26th May I conducted a programme on "High Performance Managerial Skills for Saipem India Private Limited a Project Construction Company. The programme was well received, especially the Edutainment in the form of use of Movie Clippings to communicate Management Messages.

Financial Well Being

On 17th and 21st May I conducted sessions on Financial Well Being for the Retirees of Ashok Leuyland Limited. This is regular feature where I brief them on the need for Financial Planning for Retirement and after. I also give them inputs on Portfolio structuring and wealth maximization with safety. I generally suggest a mix of Mutual Funds and Government Bonds/Post Office Savings.

One thing that constantly surprises me is the way those about to retire would willingly "invest" their funds with brokers who suggest intra-day trading while totally resist investment in Systematic Investment Plans in Diversified Mutual Funds as risky!

Another suggestion I give to them is to buy 24 carat Gold coins or invst in a Gold ETF rather than buy ornamental gold. This usually finds resistance among women. But during the session on 17th, my suggeation was supported and vindicated by one of the participants, Mr. V who stated that he had consistyently bought 24 carat Gold coins instead of ornamental gold. He sold the coins at the timew of his I daughter's marriage and made huge gains which he used not only to buy ornaments but also meet the marriage expenses. He has started doing the samre thing for his II daughter's marriage too. His only regret is that he had not bought more 24 Carat gold coins!

Training Activities-I

On 21st May I conducted an Executive DEvelopment Programme for the Institute of Company Secrataries of India. The participants were young and energetic Company Secretaries who were quite interactve and participated actively. You can see a participant presenting the viewsof her group on a case study here.

Coutralam

Before returning to Chennai, we thought to bathe in Coutralam falls. The five falls was a no more than a .75 falls! Men had a small trickle on one side and the women an even smaller one on the other. We convinced the crowd to form a queue and took turns to stand under the falls as if we were taking bath at a pump set!

After this “bath”, we went to the Coutrala Nathar Temple. This is a famous temple and it houses images of all the deities from the major Shiva temples all over Tamilnadu and Andhra like Anna Malaiar and Kalathiappar. There is a shrine for Dharma Sastha here with a colored idol depicting the God mounted on a horse.

We then visited the Ilanchi Kumaran Temple. Ilanchi means young and charming and refers to the Murugan in this temple. Though the main deities are Iru Vaalugesar and Iruvaalugesarkiniyal, the temple is well known as Murugan shrine. The shrine of Muruga is situated just adjacent to the Shiv Sannidahanam.

The temple elephant was an elegant animal and as is my usual habit I tried to snap it. But there is a prohibition. The earlier elephant which was much admired by all had died after a strong beating from its mahout. So, they do not permit photography of the pachyderm.

Sori Muthu Ayyanar

After the bath at the Agasthiyar falls, we went further up into the Mundan Thurai reserve forest to the ancient woodland shrine of Sori Muthu Ayyanar Kovil. The temple houses several Dravidian deities such as Sudalai Maadan, Brahmarakshasi Devi, Sangili Karuppan and of course Sori Muthu Ayyanar with his two consorts. These are horrible gods with horrifying features and frightening poses. The ride a variety of vahanas or animals like the tiger, horse, elephant and bull. But, Ayyanar and his warriors are essentially demi-gods who punish evil-doers mercilessly. They are reflections of the primitive societies that conceived their symbolism; primitive societies that believe in punishment as the best deterrent to crime. Ayyanars sitting or standing sword in hand and eyes bulging out are a constant reminder of the dire physical punishments that await transgressions against moral and social codes.

Agasthyar Falls

Our journey to sabhari Malai began at Thirunelveli. In the morning we had an invigorating and refreshing bath at Agasthiyar falls above Papanasam. As this is summer, the quantity of water was less, but the force was pretty strong. The journey up the hills via Karaiyar Dam offers scenic views and vistas of nature’s bountiful splendors.

Although the entire Thamirabarani basin in Thirunelveli district is lush green and pleasing to the eye, the Senkottai, Thenkasi and its environs are perennially scenic with cool weather throughout the year and the pleasant Thenral (Southern Breeze) from the Pothigai hills which surround the entire area.

The Yatra to Sabhari Malai Contd...

I give three reasons why the Dewaswom Board will not be able to provide better facilities:

1. The Sannidhanam is right in the middle of thick reserve forest. It is not anywhere near large urban agglomerations, unlike Thirumala or Vaishno Devi. The journey from Nilakkal Estate the neartest human habitation to Pamba is thick jungle. The human presence is a thin crust over the layers of jungle waiting to reclaim the whole place the minute human beings move out. (Have we not heard tales of how elephants and tigers move into the temple precincts after the Makara Jyothi? Have we not heard that before the Periyaa Paathai or “Long Route” is opened up by the forest department for the Makara Jyothi, the Mel Thanthri first chants mantras and uses tantric mudras to lock the animals and keep them at bay temporarily during the season?)
2. To further construct or erode into the jungle would irreparably damage the bio-diversity of the place.
3. The fact that the temple is open only for hardly 150 days in the year.

Lastly Ayyappan himself came to Sabhari Malai to meditate; so why disturb him? After all He is free and ready to see us at Ariyagkaavu, Achan Kovil and kulathu Puzha!

The Yatra to Sabhari Malai

I returned today from my Annual Pilgrimage to Sabhari Malai, legs aching and feeling tired, yet fully suffused with a sense of inner joy from the divine experienceand exposure to the sylvan surroundings of the Sabhari hills.

One of the positive changes I noticed was that the circling route from Marakkootam to Sannidham is now fully concrete covered. This means we can walk faster on bare feet without worrying about the roots, stones and slippery mud during the rainy season.

As regards the Sabhari Yatra, I hear two opinions about the need for enduring hardships and extreme physical discomfort. One school feels that this is not necessary and that the Devaswom board can provide more amenities and facilities like Thirumala Thirupathi or Vaishno Devi. The other school of thought that consists of senior swamis and the extremely ritual-bound holds that the arduous terrain should be retained. They give examples of how it was in those days. There is no doubt that the climb up Neeli Malai itself was pretty tough in those days. In fact there was a point where the only way to climb up Appachi Medu was by crambling up the thick roots of a tree in the middle of the path. Remember that all this is done with irumudi or offerings to the lord balanced on your head. I have done this in 1984 and 1985.

The route today is a paved path with steep inclines and rough stones but there are steps almost throughout. My personal view is that the route should be maintained as far as possible as it was since time immemorial.

Another thing that I observe more frequently is the wearing of footwear during the climb. While do not criticize or comment on this, I would like to submit that almost all hills with shrines on top are in themselves divine and as such wearing footwear while climbing may be a desecration. This, of course, is a viewpoint and highly debatable.

Moonstruck!

16.05.2010

Mr. T V Shiva Kumar my good friend and trainer conducted a workshop today evening at the P S Venkatesan Memorial Hall on “Parenting”. We had about fifteen participants, five of whom were trainers. Mr. Shivakumar kept the audience spell bound in his usual inimmicable style. In fact the program which was scheduled to end at 7:00 PM went on till 7:30 PM. I gave the welcome address and introduced T V shivakumar. I quoted Thirukkural on Parenting and set the tone for the evening’s deliberations.

I saw the crescent moon with a star just below the curve of the crescent. I am sure the star was somewhere far beyond the moon in outer space. But from the point of view of an earth-bound person with purely geo-spatial perspective it seemed as if the star was suspended down from the moon! I made a crude attempt at capturing this image which can be seen here!

Bangalore Weather

19.05.2010

The weather at Bangalore today is definitely cooler and cloudy. The oppressive heat which made one sweat and suffocate yesterday has now become the usual cool weather of Bangalore with occasional showers and wind. This is too early in the year for rain at Bangalore. Rain sets in around June here. Maybe it is a fall out of the Cyclone in TN which, I am told is sending extraordinary rainfall to Chennai! Well…don’t we need any rain that we can get?

Playing Cricket

18.05.2010

I am in Bangalore for handling sessions at the ICAI Chapter here. In the evening on my way back from Basant Nagar, my Autorikshastopped at a signal. I was hemmed in by vehicles on all sides which made the already warm weather pretty hot. I was casually looking around when on my immediate left, I saw a group of boys playing cricket in an open space beyond a crumbling wall. They were using the wide trunk of tall tree as their stumps. The pleasant peaceful game in that sylvan surrounding amidst the traffic noise, sounds, heat, dust and tension of the city caught my fancy. So I immediately snapped it from my auto!

Akshaya Thrithiya

Today is Akshaya Thrithiya day . It is believed that anything, especially Gold, acquired or obtained today will multiply and grow. Kshaya means decay or reduction. Akshaya means no reduction or unending.

Thrithiya is the third day after the new moon or the full moon. This is a day signifying abundance and growth. But, can acquiring and purchasing things truly bring abundance in ourt life. While I respect and accept the traditional belief system, I also feel a spirit of abundance and trust has its foundation within us. As we nurture this abundance principal and prayerfully work on our plans our efforts are blessed with this abundance of material wealth that we may share it with others and use for the benefit of all.

This belief has been effectively used by Gold merchants to create an artificial demand on this day for the shining metal. The entire Gold market area on Usman Road is flooded with people eagre to capitalize on the benefits of this auspicious day. There are special traffic policemen everywhere monitoring the flow and controlling or preventing stampedes.

Personally I decided to spend some time today donating blood for a young child at the Apollo Cancer Hospital on Teynampet. By the grace of the Almighty, donating blood is one thing I've been able to do for quite some time now. It is an extremely powerful feeling of warmth and happiness to donate blood to total strangers.

As the blood slowly drips through the needle, I usually chant silently the Gayathri Mantra or the Maha Mrtyunjaya Mantra (both are powerful life enabling incantations. As I do this, I sincerely pray for the quick recovery, long life and health of the donee patient whoever they might be.

If someone were to ask me to give a list of worthwhile things I have done in my life, regularly donating blood voluntarily would top my list. This body which is ultimately going to die and decay is in this way useful for someone ion need.

As I donated blood on this day of abundance and growth, I pray to the Almighty that I should be able to give abundantly of whatever I may have....

Be your own Motivator

One of the key concepts I stressed yesterday at the EDAC Supervisory Skills Development programme was the need for self motivation in a supervisor. I exhorted them to be their own motivators and not wait for others to motivatre them. I suggested they use self hypnosis and speking positive words within themselves to motivate themselves.

I also spoke about the three roles that have to be played by them: initiator of an idea or plan; Executor of the idea and finally evaluator of the effectiveness of the execution. It would be ideal if a supervisor could perform all the three roles.

We also discussed the need for feedback to change and grow. Sometimes feedback, especially from superiors may be harsh or hurtful. But one must remember that it is “stones that bear the chisels blow that become statues up on high…” and bear the harshness of the words by allowing it to mould us. It would be great if everyone had a mentor or guide to mould us and make us perfect. But, even if there is no mentor to mould us, we should not hesitate to wield the chisel on ourselves and become the sculptors of our own lives and fates. The heroine of K Balachander’s “Kalki” is depicted as a sculptor who works on herself. It is painful process; but the ultimate result and sense of fulfillment can be extraordinarily fulfilling. s

EDAC Supervisory Skills Program

15.10.2010

Today, I conducted Supervisory skills Development programme for the executives of EDAC Engineering Limited. The programme was well received. I heartened to see these comments:

I have attended a lot of training programs…but this one we learn lot of things and enjoy more.

T Ashok –Supervisor

I have attended so many programs like skill development programs…but your approach is best compared to other programmes.

K Hariharan – Purchase Officer

Tempered Steel

13.10.2010

Tenneco RC Hosur manufactures Ride controls. Ride Controls are our good old shock absorbers and struts when they are at home.. They also make emission controls (that’s silencers, exhaust pipes and mufflers.) But that’s not at Hosur.

Around the end of the second day, at the request of the participants, I spoke for a short while about “the Seven Habits.” I was describing the fifth habit and how it softens you and makes you more understanding, when a participant expressed a view that if you are too soft then people take advantage of you. I replied with my usual comparison with silk: soft outside, tough within.

Then, I compared seven habits practitioners with tempered steel, strong and flexible like the struts that Tenneco makes! Strong enough to absorb the shocks of driving over ruts and pot holes but flexible so that it doesn’t break!

Strength with flexibility seems to be the essential attitude that the constant practice of the seven habits induces. In this sense practicing seven habits is like constantly tempering ourselves.

Hosur visit

12.10.2010

I am here in Hosur to handle sessions on Finance for Non-Finance managers for Tenneco RC, Hosur. Most of the participants are General Managers and Managers.

They have put me up in the Renaissance Sarovar portico. This is the only three star property in Hosur. It is on the main highway running towards Chennai a short distance from the new bus stand. Hosur is developing quite fast. Yet, it retains a rural ambience. The development is just a thin layer of skin on either side of the highway. Most of the development is fuelled by the various companies that have set up shopin the SIPCOT industrial park and elsewhere. From my window I can see green fields, coconut trees and a hillock in the distance.

The power of Giving

A nice story that I heard at the 250^th Meeting of the Chennai Toastmasters Club. It was told by TM Nagaraja Rao:

Once upon a time there was king who used to oiccasionally go out into his kingdom. One day as the King was thus going around, he saw a beggar. The King approached the beggar. The beggar was happy as he thought he would get some alms.
But, the King on nearing him asked the beggar to give him something. The beggar was flabbergasted. But as the king was asking, he put his hands into his alms bag which had grain in it. He carefully took out a handful of rice grains and handed it over to the king, who took it and rode away.

The next day the beggar received a small bundle from the King’s palace. He opened it and therein found a grain of pure gold for every grain of rice he had given. Now, he regretted that he had not given more!

Nagaraja Rao compared this to Toastmasters and said that whatever one gave to Toastmasters we would get back manifold!

Tall Tales at Two Hundred and Fifty

25.04.2010

The Chennai Toastmasters Club conducted its 250th Meeting today. There was a Tall Tales Contest to commemorate the day and the Past presidents of the Club were recognized. As one of the Past Presidents I queued up to receive my memento from TM Nagaraja Rao DTM.

A Few of the Tall Tales were good though the bulk of them were lackluster. Most of the youngsters were highly narcissistic and there was excessive concern about themselves and very little creativity. This meant that that most tall tales were no more than wishful thinking.

There were exceptions too. For example, the winners were both innovative and creative. Subhadra the winner gave an account about an imaginary club called Cheesemasters which her cat had attended. She used her talent in mimicry to good effect and kept the audience guessing as to how she'll interpret the Ten Projects of Toastmasters visa vis Cheese Masters.

Me. Ramnath with his extraordinary tale of becoming an attachment to his own E Mail message was a well deserving runner up. His use of Info Tech metaphors in his speech was excellent. (I Loved It)

Quotables:

The thin line of difference between genius and insanity is measured by success. (A quote by Bruce Feirstein, American Creen Writer and Humorist)

When you call someone aged to speak, remember that the length of the speech is proportional to the age and the content is inversely proportional. (Prof Chandrasekhar the first President of CTM who revived Toastmastering in Chennai...incidentally his speech was short and highly informative.0